The issue of self-help, achieving happiness by herself is one of the hottest topic nowadays. Naval Ravikant, for example, created a whole philosophy of achieving happiness as a skill. But to evaluate such ideas, we need to move back to a more basic fundamental question - how independent is a person in creating her own destiny?
Many supporters of fatalism argue that fate exists and a person will come to it sooner or later. It seems to me that this is not a very useful concept that demotivates a person, as a rule, only by explaining her situation, and not changing it. But the fatalists are right in some places.
Even if we agree that a person creates her own destiny, it is obvious that she creates exactly the destiny that she has chosen for herself. But the choice of this fate is a cruel joke, since it is determined by a complex of external and internal factors. And these factors are often independent of the person:(
Often this problem can be seen in the desire to increase the aspirations of young people so that they achieve greater results. For example Noah Smith or Tyler Cowen are actively talking about it. And this is logical, judge for yourself. Suppose a young man had 2-3 unhappy relationships (unrequited or just broken), most likely his expectations and ideas about love will differ significantly from those of someone who has a good relationship. Or take a more economic example. A person, living among poor and unambitious people, will consider achieving success as something inaccessible, looking for the reasons for the success of others in wealth, parents, luck, etc. (and all this will be partially true, but even starting from a low base you can achieve quite above average results if you'll take actions). I myself grew up in such an environment and it is very difficult to dream of any superresults there (my detachment on the Internet helped me a lot).
Therefore, it is so important to manage the expectations from the fate of a person, which she, to a greater or lesser extent, will realize on her own. And do not be afraid of the mechanisms for managing expectations, as if something authoritarian. These expectations are already formed everyday in every family, but it is not clear by whom. Raising these expectations is a social task, just like giving free basic education. Are we good at this task? I think we can better.
What agents can be responsible for raising the aspirations of individuals?
1. Parents;
2. Schools and universities;
3. Alternatives to schools and universities that I think about a lot;
4. Influencers in the broadest sense of the word (from writers to tiktokers) (for me, Musk became such an influencer with his "do something BOLD"'
5. Culture in a broad sense.
Someone else? Regarding actions, this is a rather complex work that requires activity for each agent. You can start simple - from influencers and alternatives to schools / universities, after which you can spread the campaign to parents and official institutions. The main thing is to realize the importance of determining the expectation of a person's fate and begin to positively influence them, creating benefits for both the person and society (win-win).